Flakes and Ghosts 

I can never understand why it’s so hard for people to text back. I’m not sure what’s going on but it seems like there’s something in the water that just makes ghosting and being a complete and total flake acceptable nowadays. As a person who has been ghosted once and flaked on many times, I’m over it. I can’t stand it. If I text you, I know you got it and I expect an answer. 

I’m tired of getting the “oh sorry, I was sleeping” or “oh sorry, my phone was off” and all the other bs.  And then,  amidst the lies,  you’ll see the person you just texted on Snapchat updating their story or on Facebook posting a new status. Ohhhh, your phone is dead but you can update your Snapchat still?? Interesting. My phone doesn’t do that. 

 I mean, if you’re going to be a flake, a least be good at lying. 

If you’re going to be a ghost, you have to ghost all those other social media platforms. So if messenger says “last online 10 minutes ago” but you’ve been sleeping for 4 hours, you’re lying. 

Do I sound crazy? Yes, but there are reasons why I am this way.

Firstly, I grew up around flakes. People saying they were going to do things but never actually doing them. People making promises but never actually fulfilling the promises. That gets old really fast. When you’re a kid and all you want to do is go to the pool and your mom has promised you all day that she’ll take you and then at the last second she said she’s tired and can’t, you start to get really annoyed with people who flake. 

I mean, I understand that issues will arise and sometimes people have to back out of plans but I don’t like when people make plans and act like they’re all gung-ho to go and then they pull out. It’s not cool to be a liar. 

Oh and ghosting, don’t even get me started with ghosting. 

Not too long ago, I was completely ghosted by this guy. We were talking as friends and I guess it was sort of romantic but he was sort of flaky the entire time. He’d text/message me and for days and we would have this really cool conversation about life and politics. We’d joke around about things happening around us and talk about life. I don’t know, we had good times, I thought. Then he’d disappear for three or four days. 

He’d always come back and say he was really depressed or had a lot on his plate that he needed to focus on. He always said he needed to go “off grid”.  This left me feeling really confused. I get that sometimes people need some alone time. But why not just say that? Why not just tell me, “hey, I’m going to be very busy for X amount of days and I can’t talk as much as I usually do. I will get back with you when I am finished with this stressful time in my life.” But even then, you can still talk to people and continue stressful moments in your life. It’s not that difficult. But with this guy, it was all or nothing.

It was then that I really noticed that I didn’t like that shit at all. I don’t want to get into any nitty-gritty details but this guy ended up inviting me to his best friends wedding where he was the best man. I went to the wedding with him, we danced, we had a really great time, and at the end of the night he told me that he would call me and make sure that I got home safely. EXCEPT HE NEVER DID. I guess he just needed a date to the wedding or something? But after that night he never spoke to me again. I never saw him again. I never heard anything from him. He just disappeared.

WHO DOES THAT?? I’m still perplexed by it to this day. I never did anything to this dude but try to help him through stressful times in his life. He had a sick mother. He suffered from depression. He was a little shy and awkward around people. I get it. But all I really got was ghosted. 


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